Avocado Oil & Erotic Massage

 Let's clear this up straight away: I do not use avocado oil on my clients. I always use grapeseed oil for all the reasons that make it the industry standard.

But if you are trying this at home I just wanted to throw this suggestion out there. 

I use it at home for frying, on salads, and I've used it to moisturise my own skin. 

I use other products too, of course including other oils. 

I use plenty of hemp, rape, and olive oil plus coconut oil, all depending on what I've got in the cupboard and what I'm making. I have no qualms about swapping one oil for another and changing flavours.

Anyway, if you love avocados, don't over look their oil.

Tantric Lingam Massage in Cheshire Available at Short Notice

 At least monthly I will have a text message conversation that goes something like this:

Message: Are you available tomorrow?

Me: No, but I'm available plenty of other times, you can look at my schedule and book in advance.

Message: I'm only available tomorrow.

Me: Sorry, I'm booked. Plan more in advance next time.

Message: If you get a cancellation let me know.

At this point I don't know what to say.

Never say never, the booked person might just cancel right then and it all works out.

Cancelling a Sensual Massage

What I want to tell the person behind the message is that doesn't often happen. Sometimes people cancel just the day before, but not often.

Occasionally people cancel on the same day, but that's really rare.

As for people just not showing up? Well, that's all most as rare as hens' teeth.

People do cancel. Lot's of people cancel and often. I have a simple online system so people can easily book and reschedule and cancel. Butt they normally do all those things way in advance.

Anyway, if someone does cancel the following morning - on the day of their appointment - should I really message a person who contact me the day before? That doesn't make sense to me.

Surely that person has already made other arrangements - I think this because the person has told me they have such limited free time that they only had one day to see me and they were unable to make any other date in the future. If they really want to see me then they would have looked at my schedule and made an appointment. 

I also want to tell them that I am not scrabbling around trying to fill my diary. If a client cancels, I already have plenty of things to fill my time, so it isn't a problem for me.

That's all just about how I work - in my one person part-time operation. This isn't true for other businesses of course.

How Can I Make Money Offering Lingam Massage, Yoni Massage, Tantric Massage

 I could write the book on this one, and perhaps one day I will.

But who would buy it?

It's not going to be a best seller when I tell the truth: it is difficult and probably impossible to make a full-time living as a Lingam Massage Therapist.

That's not what anyone want to hear.

Especially nowadays when we're bombarded with averts for change your life and get rich methods. Honestly, if you want to get rich or even make above the average wage then do something else!

I'm always sceptical of those individuals who appear in the adverts saying: 

"I started selling a niche product on line and now I work 5 minutes a day and make mega money." 

Because if that's true, why are they sell courses to teach other people to do the same!  

Everyone can see I have run my SEXY MASSAGE business in the same way for over a decade, so perhaps I've found the secret sauce and I'm keeping it to myself by warning other people not to even try it.

Hey, that would make sense: that's exactly what I would do! 

The average income in the UK is something over £30,000 per year and in the last decade I have not made anything near that from offering my massage service.  But if you were to start up in business you might well earn more than me if you do something differently. 

These are some of the things that have kept my revenue (the income) low:

1. Limited hours - this has been my biggest constraint the entire time. I've had children and therefore the need to factor in their needs. I have never offered full time hours. I've never been available 48 weeks of the year.

2. Having outside premises as I don't work from home and this is a big expense. If you work from home you can cut your costs and travel issues. You do need to think about client parking and have an immaculate space for the clients including bathroom facilities.

3. In all the years I've offered my service in its current format (over a decade) it has always only been my secondary income. I run another business so I divide my time and attention. This suits me as I don't like having all my eggs in one basket, and I was easily able to pivot when we had lockdown for the pandemic.

If you set up your business offering 2 or 3 time slots per day morning and afternoon with the occasional evening and you were consistently available for at least 46 weeks per year then you would certainly have a good chance at gaining regular clients and earning more than me.*** Although that's not all there is to it.

Now, for some amusing stories... well, amusing to me anyway.

I've seen businesses start up and disappear within a year, some of them have copied my business completely down to tiny details. Some of those details which I started are now very much standard. I'm fairly certain that it was my website in 2011 that was the first to tell clients the exact time allocated for the massage and the time allocated for conversations and getting changed 

It used to be that all other sites would simple advertise a 1 hour massage, when they actually meant a 30-40 minute massage.

Initially, I promised my massage would be at least 75 minutes. I was twice as expensive as the massage parlours in my area but offering a session that would be twice as long. And when clients came to me they knew exactly what they'd get and how much it would cost: which was all vague and hidden in massage parlours.

Anyway, over the many years various people have set up copy-cat businesses to me and extremely close to me when I was based in Kent (2 or 3 times they were located within 1 mile) without actually doing all their research. They opened, they closed. They didn't see the success they were hoping for.

Now clients do talk. And a few will visit all the services. So I did get to hear about the differences from the client's perspectives. It is my impression that my competitors did two things different from me:

1. overestimated the number of clients that would see and therefore were disappointed with the financial return.* remember I've never needed it to make a FT income.

2. underestimated the attention to detail required for every aspect that wasn't the actually massage service: things like excellent clean facilities and extra time for talking.

***

Are you still with me?

Have I put you off?

Have you realised this business isn't the route to giving up your day job and making more money than ever before.

DO NOT GIVE UP THE DAY JOB

This kind of work is ideal if:

1. You already have the perfect premises and don't need to invest money in a separate building (because the chances are that will never pay out for you).

2. You only need to work PT hours and can be flexible with those hours. Note: almost all of the clients will want daytime appointments. You will find hardly any demand for 7pm or later.

3. You aren't under financial pressure because you do have a different main income.

***

That is the Reality Check delivered

Now, if this kind of work is ideal for you now that you have had the reality check then get down to the nitty gritty of doing the work. That really could be a book, or a course. Perhaps I could offer a mentorship.

I didn't start doing this overnight. If you have any thoughts comments or questions I'd love to hear them.

Slow & Sexy Erotic Massage is not the same as a Quick Rub with a Happy Ending

From time to time, I'm asked if I could do a 1-hour erotic massage service.

The short answer is NO.

But let me explain a little bit about my thinking.

The Cheshire based YLM Approach to Lingam & Erotic Sexy Massage:

* I aim to provide a slow unhurried pampering service 

* it is self-indulgent self-care for clients who don't have to rush to an appointment afterwards. They aren't under pressure for time and neither am I.

* If they have work, my clients usually book to see me when they have a day off. 

* Many of my clients are single, some are widowers, some have complex emotional and physical issues.

* Many of my clients have come to talk about personal matters (usually after they get to know me) in addition to the 90-minutes of massage.

* Allowing time before and after and including clean up, I actually allow 3-4 hours for each session and each session does take a minimum of 3 hours of my time and a surprising amount of mental energy. I really enjoy the sessions, they are relaxing and satisfying but still take energy from me.

Contrast all that with:

The Fast Service Massage Parlour Happy Ending Mentality

The people who are looking for a session of 1-hour or less are:

* looking for something very different from what I offer

* approaching me with a completely different mindset to my typical clients

* looking for a quickie massage with hand relief "happy ending" and they want to squeeze it into their busy day. 

* Careful with their money and have limited funds - I can totally understand and respect this. The point about pampering and treats is that sometimes we have to save up for them. But also my service won't be for everyone so I hope no one spends their money with me if it is not what they are looking for. I only have the time to see about 3 clients per week on average.

Apples and tomatoes are two completely different types of fruit.

The same is true of comparing my specialist erotic massage or Lingam Massage to a standard massage parlour service. 

If you are looking for a quick service and to be in and out within 60 minutes so the masseuse can get ready for the next client straight after you - then that is what you should look for.

Sensual Massage In Cheshire on Heated Massage Table

 It's difficult to imagine getting sensual and sexy when it's freezing outside. 

Fear not. I have a heated massage bed with thick comfy padding and so far no complaints, if you don't count the people who said they thought they might fall sleep after I'd finished with them.

No Rush Sensual Massage

I don't mind if people fall asleep. I have all the time to spare and no reason to rush anyone out of the door. Sleep snore, dribble and be happy... I'm fine with all that. 

But often my clients have things planned for the rest of the day.

So, as I was saying, so far I have successfully kept people warm and comfortable. In fact, last week while it was a bitter shade of ZERO outside he was almost in danger of becoming too warm in my room. That's OK - I'm happy to turn all the heating off. No one has to cook like a turkey at Christmas.

But if anyone isn't warm enough, they only have to speak up because I have warm over blankets too.

This image isn't me! And there are no winged birds of prey in the building. But sometimes I feel like this lady (on the inside).

Image found at Pixebay https://pixabay.com/photos/magic-owl-flower-mistress-night-1285540/

Sexy Massage at Christmas

If you are thinking of visiting me over the coming weeks I have left open every possible date except 25th December (I've got something go on that day!), so that you can make a booking to suit you. 

However, as sessions fill up I will block out others because I will not be doing a massage every day. You will not be able to book a massage for the same day. I would recommend you book well in advance if possible.

Do People Go For Sexy Massages At Christmas?

Yes. In my long experience lots of people want to pamper themselves in December when the dark nights are long, the short days are too short and we feel cold and worn down. 

It is always a busy month. If you are thinking of treating yourself, book early and know you are not alone.

Why do I Offer a Lingam Massage in North West England?

 Well, because that's where I live, somewhere between Manchester and Stoke-on-Trent, not too far from Crewe or The Peak District. 

It's a perfect location. Beautiful. Rural. And accessible.

TBH, it's only just into the North-West, it is also on the border with the West Midlands.

But WHY a Lingam Massage?

I trained as a massage therapist but it seemed to me that massage is personal, private, and it can be very sensual and erotic. Often it makes sense to massage MORE of the body -- EVERY INCH!

Also, I'm a broad minded person and interested in other sex, happiness and people. It's something I realised I can offer to the world to actually improve people's lives. Put a real smile on their faces and make them feel good.

So, Why Not Do It for Charity?

Ha! Ha! Seriously, I've kids to support and bills to pay, just like everyone else. My current rate, £80ph, is a reasonable rate to pay and still makes it worthwhile for my time.

 

What is the Purpose of A Tantric Massage?

 As always - my answer applies to me and the massage that I do; it is not a general answer that applies to everyone.

The people who visit me may have a number of different reasons for booking an appointment; here are some:

6 Reasons People Book a Tantric Massage:

• Curiosity - want to try something new.
• It was recommended to them by a friend in real life, in a book, or on the interweb.
• They hope to experience something "different" compared to their everyday life: a sort of escapism.
• For personal growth: They aim to learn something new about themselves and their sexuality.
• They want to improve their sex life.
• To relax and de-stress, using this in the same way as they might book a whole range of different therapies.

I might be able to help them achieve their goals. In fact, I really do my best to help my clients get the experience they are looking for. 

These things are a normal part of my sessions, so take them as given: If you are just hoping to:

• relax,
• do nothing but just feel what's done to you,
• have an extremely erotic time,
• have amazing orgasms.

Most clients do experience feelings - both physical and emotional - that are intense, unexpected, and out of the ordinary. I can't guarantee miracles (but you never know). 

In order to get there it is vital that YOU (the client) relax and give yourself over to what is happening. And my role is to help you achieve this. 

By setting the scene, laying my hands on your body, and taking my time, I will guide you from the stressed person who left the in the car park to the person who is flying high without a care in the world. 

I will help you to relax, and I have various techniques for this - more than just physical touch. 

One More Common Reason to Book a Tantric Session 

If you are hoping for more than erotic relaxation (and amazing orgasms), then do talk to me. 

Not all clients what to talk, and that's OKAY; most just come along just for the experience in that session.

Others want to take away tips to improve their sex life: that's understandable. 

Ask me, I'm happy to share my knowledge.

What Else Can I Expect from a Tantra Session?

Over the years, people have come to talk to me about a whole variety of issues that I might be able to help with. I'm not a doctor, a nurse, or a lawyer... I will recommend you get expert advice if you need it.

Many just want a second opinion from a friendly stranger: often about: 

• their bodies,
• their work,
• their sex lives,
• their relationships.

A common question I hear: Is this normal? 

A common statement: I have an intimate problem...

Through the session, we will make a connection. People trust me.

Yes, I talk with people about an amazing range of things - if they want to. Just as our bodies are a connected whole (so I don't focus on just one area), so are our lives. Different unrelated things spill over to affect other parts of our lives. That's okay.

Don't worry, if you don't want to talk, that's okay too.

Find My Website at UK Lingam Massage

Offering Sexy Massage in Cheshire: I'm about to get started

 The room is ready: lighting, music, and equipment are all in place.

And heating - it's much colder in Cheshire than in my previous place in Kent.

I've taken the precaution of buying a heat mat for underneath, a heated blanket for on top, as well as the central heating and a bonus electric heater. 

I'm leaving nothing to chance because clients do not want to be cold. no matter the running cost, I will not be reducing the room temperature.

Oh, in case you are wondering what temperature I aim for when you are having a massage: around the client, I would expect the area to be at least 21C, but I'd aim for 24C.

Erotic Massage in Cheshire for mature clients

 I am back in business after a very long break.

And my new streamlined website covers all the relevant information in only 2 pages, far fewer pages than the older version.

Check it out: UK Lingam Massage dot co dot uk

UK Lingam and yoni massage in the UK: Mildlands & North West region

I will be back in business this summer offering lingam massage services to MATURE men over the age of 50. 

My break from the business became an extended break of more than 2 years due to the pandemic. I don't know about you but I filled lockdown time with cake! 

And I offer a service to women.

Trans people are welcome. 

Sorry young guys, I'm not for you.

I will soon be able to let you know more detail, but here is a quick rundown of what you need to know:

Premises: I am above a shop on a busy High Street. I am near a big free car park and a train station so it will be easy to get to me. But you must be able to walk, you can't park outside my premises and you will have to come up a flight of steep stairs.

Important to note:

It is for a 90-minute session + there is time to talk before & after. My service is no rush.

I wear a massage therapist's uniform throughout the session, I do not dress up in sexy lingerie or anything else. I will not be naked by you will be. 

Don't be nervous will put you completely at ease - I have plenty of experience at this.

I see ONE client only per day _ so I am fresh and full of energy & you will be completely pampered.

The appointments are in the morning, typically starting at 10 am ( I can make it a little earlier or later if you prefer).

I'm really looking forward to getting back to it.

UPDATE: East Cheshire location near M6, email address, how to book, book online via my online calendar, full details on my website: UKLingamMassage.co.uk 

Lingam massage at the weekend

For the next couple of months I'm going to offer sessions at the weekends at around 12 noon. I do not expect to be booked every Saturday and Sunday, so don't worry about my health, I won't be working 7 days a week.
But I am offering some flexibility.
Please book in advance by email: ylmkent@yahoo.co.uk

Still In Business in Kent offering Lingam Massages Monday to Friday daytimes

I haven't posted to this blog in years and every now and again I'll get an email asking if I am still in business.
Well, yes I am.
I try to keep my main website up to date on the front page telling you of my hours and holidays.
I'm not much of a writer when I'm not working.
However, I do have lots of thoughts to share so my new years resolution made in April 2019 id to try to write a little more often on this website.

xxx

Am I normal?

It is six months since my last confession. I had Almost forgotten my password! In fact, I've been blogging, just a little, on the new blog attached to my website.
If you want to take a look it is here: ukLingamMassage

Back to work...

Like everyone else I thought I should go with convention and write a back to work & Happy New Year blog.
That's. Consider it done.
I've only seen 2 clients this year. So getting out of practice.
I forgot a pillow for the first one. A dear regular who didn't hesitate to remind me.
For the second (another dear regular, I have to write that in case he is reading) I forgot our glasses of water.  It is thirsty work.
Perhaps I'll get it all right on the third session.

Sexy Massage in December 2014

December is always a busy month in the world of massage as is January. Perhaps when it is dark, and around Christmas time, men feel the need to treat themselves.
Perhaps an erotic massage is the antidote to work-Christmas-parties?
My tip for the month then is book ahead if you can.

Unfortunately I have lots of missed calls. I can't answer the phone if I'm with a client or if I'm out and about.  So do persist or better still, email me. Please do not text though. I don't do texts.

Will erotic Massage be made illegal?

Northern Ireland have moved a step close to making it a criminal offense to pay for sexual services ( see here http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-29699626 )

in the very mistaken belief that this will prevent the terrible things that happen to some young women: being raped, trafficked, kidnapped, etc.   We've heard those harrowing stories on the news.

The men who do those terrible things to women (the kidnappers and traffickers) do not care about the law, they are already breaking many laws.  The idea behind the new law is to take away the demand side so that there is no financial gain to be had from pimping, from trafficking women, keeping them prisoner and renting their bodies for sex.

The logic of this argument is beyond belief, to me.  

It is akin to saying that because some children are kept as slaves to work in factories in appalling conditions with out rights or reasonable pay we will ban all imported clothes, or ban factories, or make cotton an illegal commodity.  Ridiculous.  We do not assume all foreign factories are bad employers, we do not assume working in a factory must be inherently inhumane.

Take my work, by contrast.

I am a qualified massage therapist living in an area where £40 per hour for a massage is the usual rate.  It is an area over run with qualified therapists, however, so it could be extremely tough to attract enough clients to make a living from massage.

I'm happy to take my clothes off, I'm happy for my clients to be naked, I could perhaps charge more for a naturist massage. I like doing the erotic massage that is described on my website for which clients pay between £120 to £190 per session (not enough time in one hour).  Clients know exactly what to expect because I have given a full description of the service on the website, I can earn a reasonable amount (I'm not a high earner it's just a living) doing a job I like.

If such a law was to be passed in England, overnight my clients could be turned into criminals.  They are lovely, decent respectable people (like most men).  I do not know if clients would continue to visit me.  I expect existing clients may keep coming but it may be hard to reassure new clients that there will not be policemen outside my house.

There are a whole group of anti-prostitution campaigners who think every women working in the industry of selling sexual services wants to get out or would be better off if she were out of this business.  This is simply not true.  There are many mature, well educated women offering sexual services of some sort in the UK because they want to, it has been a life-enhancing positive career choice for them.
Am I in denial, would I be better off if I didn't do Lingam Massages? Absolutely not, my life would be tougher.

What of the men who pay?  They are not some criminal underclass, subset of society.  In my experience they are respectful, polite and respectable.  Many of them are single.  Many of them have no sexual partner.  For them, women like myself are providing a vital service that increases self esteem and a sense of mental well being.  

September must be back to work month

It is for me anyway.  Lovely to have loads of time off in August and I always find September is then one of the busiest months of the year for massage bookings.
I guess my clients have been busy too and now they need some relaxation and pampering before the seriously dark cold weather sets in.
I highly recommend booking a Lingam Massage session in advance as I generally only take one or two bookings per day, sometimes people can't believe how difficult it can be to find a mutually good time in our diaries.
But I often do have availability at short notice so it never hurts to call on the off chance...

The tantric part of the lingam massage!

One could think that a lingam massage is focused on the penis.  Yes your penis will get plenty of attention.
But is that all you are expecting?
I can't comment on what other people do but from my point of view your whole body is covered in sensitive skin that can be stimulated.
Not for getting sound, sight and smell.
Of course, there is also the mind.

To my mind, A tantric lingam massage is not a quick w***, a hand job.  It is a tantric session that has prepared for the needs of all your senses.

is-tantric-massage-sexual-or-spiritual?

​For me (and perhaps my clients) the things that I can't relate to on many websites about tantric massage are the comments about

• Chakras
• Spiritualism
• Cosmic energy
• Goddesses

and that sort of thing.  I know some would say tantric practise is fundamentally a philosophy that incorporates some elements of those things.  They talk about energy but not in the way that I would use this word.

There is a huge gulf.  

I am an English woman and my beliefs are fundamentally secular and science based, perhaps reflecting my culture.  Energy is something that I was taught in physics lessons and is all about the movements of atoms (from what I remember).  

If the philosophy and language of the spiritual approach appeal to you that is fine - it depends what you are looking for.  I believe the experience you can have in a session without the religious esoteric baggage can be equally as good.  In fact, people with strong views on these things can be completely turned of by the spiritual language.  Please do not introduce me a Goddess!  

You have such wonderful feelings in and after a tantric session and the reason can be explained with modern science (if you need a reason).  

AND

You can achieve the experience with or without bringing a philosophy or religious dogma to the table.  Let me know if you would like more on the scientific approach to tantric massage.... 

International SEX Workers Day today 2nd June

Who would think there would be such a thing as International SEx Workers Day?

Tantric massage services come and go

There are many here today and gone tomorrow businesses but I am still here and expect to be here for many years to come.
Blink and you might miss them!
My new website could still do with some work, things like that are on going projects, never really finished but always updated.
Nevertheless, I have contributed to my new blog there too.

Men who pay for sex & Lingam Massage

A quick run down of my customer demographics.  I haven't been giving them those forms to complete but just from my assessment based on conversations and observations. Read all about it here:
http://uklingammassage.co.uk/blog
My new website, at the same old address, has its own blog/news page so I guess I will mostly write their now but may write here too.

The shape of the site is finished but there is lots of info I can add.  What I would say to men who are wanting to visit me the important pages to read re those under the tab of Lingam Massage.
The others pages are optional extras, my attempt to improve the world.

How's the new website going?

It is up - thank you for asking.
The changes are small but they are there.
It is not finished, however, there are going to be some more pages going into some of the issues clients bring to me.

One of the best things is that I now tell you on my Booking page whether I am available over the next few days.  I intend to keep that up to date for people who make plans at the last minute.
And I am hoping to set that availability information on the front page for added convenience.

So the new website is still a work in progress and the biggest changes are yet to come.

April 2014

On the subject of being available (see last blog post) I am not available much over the next few weeks.  There are just 2 or 3 sessions free inbetween bookings, plus personal commitments and family gatherings.

How should my availability page work on my new website?

I could put up dates, lets say for the week ahead and blank out the days when I am definitely NOT available. I know my dad is coming to visit one day, for example, and my dentist appointment another afternoon.

I know one of my regular clients is visiting me on the Friday morning, so I can mark that as not available too.

BUT

what about the other appointments in my diary?

You see some weeks I may have 3 or 4 appointments booked within the next 7 days AND sometimes everyone of them cancels.

Yes not one of them turns up but thankfully at least the vast majority of clients do let me know one or two days before.

If I had blanked all of those spaces other potential clients viewing my diary might not contact me as they think I'm fully booked.  so, I might leave those dates as available even if there are bookings unless I am very confident the client will attend.

From what clients tell me they fall into two categories:

1. Those who can book ahead and like to work this way, there visit to me will be timetabled to fit in with work or specific events.

I must admit I also like to work this way.

2. Those who can only book at the LAST minute - the night before or on the day.

Due to work and other pressures.

Last minute bookings don't work well at the moment so it would be really good to have a better method for those.

I am thinking that what might work for these men is to just know for definite whether I have availability within the next 12-24 hours.  They are not interested in 3 days time.

Thinking as I type here - 

1. perhaps I could put an indicative diary on an availability page.

AND

2. update my availability for the next 24 hours every evening (perhaps 6pm ish) on the very front page

 ****   By the way - it is very rare for someone to simply not turn up but it does happen - to quantify I estimate about 3 times a year. *****  If you are one of those men please have more consideration, it is not normal, most men do not do that.  I could not continue to make a living if everyone did that and as I only usually see one client a day then someone else will have missed the opportunity because the time was held for you.

Suggestions for my new website

I have received quite a few useful suggestions and comments to take on board for my new website.
I think it is going to have lots more pages - I have so much to say -  but I am trying to reorganise the information to be easier to navigate.
Not all the info is relevant to all site visitors.

I am planning:
-  a page that will be regularly updated with my availability.
-  some answers to new FAQs that people send me via email.
-  the prices will stay exactly the same.

Hopefully the new website will be online next week.

99% nice guys, 1% lecherous creeps

If you have read my website but never visited me it may be very hard for you to understand how just a tiny minority of clients are annoying and seem like lecherous creeps.  Surely every session is the same, what is it that those men do that is different.

Well most men come to enjoy what I have to offer.  This minority come with their own agenda not wanting to understand or try the experience offered.

There is a pattern of behaviour and conversation that takes place with certain men, they obviously think it is normal but it is not.

For example, their eyes are open most of the session looking at me, not just looking (of course normal people will have their eyes open sometimes, we will chat and make eye contact) but starring in a lecherous way?  And they even make many comments about looking at me.

Another thing will be - the conversation, it is not the subject of the comments themselves but the way they are said and the many times they say the same thing: e.g. my appearance and that my clients must want to touch me.
No it is not normal to make many comments along these lines and my silence is because I have no POLITE reply to give you.

Another thing will be - instead of relaxing to enjoy the mystery of what will happen and experience the feelings of touch on their skin they stay totally alert and perhaps trying to control what is happening.  Remember, for most people this session is about experiencing with ALL the senses, especially making the most of touch and imagination.
I would conclude, therefore, that their experience of the session is totally different to the majority who float out of here after having a sensational experience.

It really is their loss.  My service is explained on the website and is very expensive, I expect these men would be better served by some other service provider.

This behaviour really could make a women uncomfortable:
I am approaching 50 years of age and have done this job for more years than you can imagine so I refuse to feel uncomfortable - instead I'm distracted from my job and annoyed.

So what do I do? Should I say Something?
As a professional I treat all clients with the greatest respect and I say nothing.  I have cut 2 hour sessions short to 90 minutes and refunded the £30.  I have smiled as they left and made a note to never accept another appointment from that person, at least one has tried to book again.
I do not ever point out that their behaviour is creepy, strange or annoying because they have paid a great deal of money to visit me, maybe they are leaving on a high so I do not want to spoil that for them.
But
I am sure clients who understand the service and relax to enjoy what is really on offer here have a far better time.

What about Men With Real Problems Relating to People?

I do see clients with real problems, communication and relating to people, difficulties talking to women, low self esteem, issues with body image and embarrassed about their sexual performance.
These clients are welcome - I see many men like this, they are in a completely different category to the creepy letch I discuss above.

Don't Worry - My Business is Totally Legal - WE Are not Breaking the Law When You Visit Me

Thank goodness in the UK if an adult wants to have a naturist or erotic massage there is no law against it.
And
If a man pays for an erotic lingam massage he is not a criminal.
And
As a woman who provides that service for many clients I am not breaking any laws.

All common sense you would think.

If you want to enjoy erotic touch, perhaps you do not have a partner who can do this for you so why not pay a professional?

There are a minority who want to make my clients criminals! They want to make it illegal for anyone to pay for a sexual service.

This minority have the view that if there is no-one in your life willing to have sex with you for free then you are NOT entitled to make any other arrangements.

Those people must think sex and touch are not important - but they are.

Don't worry though, I'm fairly certain they won't get anywhere with that plan.

Lingam massage now with extra padding - a more comfortable table!

I have new supper thick padding for my massage table.

I don't think you could be more comfortable anywhere else.

Perfect at men lie there for 90 minutes, 2 hours or even longer....

Womens Hour & Prostitution to be illegal - clients to be criminals

I got quite cross listening to Radio 4 Woman's hour yesterday on the subject of prostitution.  We heard of a number of women who were "traficed", kidnapped, held as prisoners beaten, raped  and forced into prostitution.  Fortunately those women escaped and lived to tell.
What happened to them is wrong and many criminal offenses were committed under our exiting laws.

I would certainly like to see more done about this and I can't understand how or why some men would choose to pay to have sex (rape) these unwilling victims.

R4 Women's Hour was presenting the case put by the
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Prostitution and the Global Sex Trade
in their new report:Shifting the Burden
you can find it here:
http://appgprostitution.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/shifting-the-burden.pdf

In a nut shell it say that the vast majority of women providing sexual services for sale are:

• women who were abused as children,
• drug users
• subject to violent pimps,
• regularly meet violent clients,
• are trapped in a world they would like to escape from,
• are subject to crime because they are fearful of the police.

This might describe some women but I seriously doubt if applies to most and it certainly does NOT describe me!

I think of my good friend who has worked as a self employed "escort" for over 20 years.  When she was unfortunately threatened with violence and robbed by a client she did not hesitate to call the police. The man was wanted for various violent crimes, was arrested and went to prison for several years.  There was no problem for my friend, as a prostitute (and tax payer) she is not a criminal, she was not scared of the police and she was happy to testify in court against him.

You may think that proves sex-workers meet violent clients.  Not really, that was only one in thousands of clients she has seen, whereas I hear teachers, nurses and doctors are regularly threatened and bank staff hide behind big counters and bullet proof glass!

Why is this issue important.
Well if you turn to the recommendations of the report, the All Parliamentary Group say:

• Criminalise the MEN who pay for sexual services.

I don't have sex with my clients but even if I did currently it is not against the law.  Neither I nor my clients are committing any criminal offence.

It would seem that the All Parliamentary Group will turn my clients in to criminals and will turn the clients of my friend in to criminals.

Our legitimate and respectable business will suffer and may close, whereas it will be business as usual for those people who already keep women as prisoners to rape them.

I could say so much more... but I will let you think on it.